What are the druids up to?

It's hugs, right? (It's never hugs.)

Druids don't want to live in harmony with nature - they want to tear down civilization before nature gets pissed off and kills us all. Here's 30 ways your local circle of druids is trying to do that.

1. Teaching barbarians how to attack fortifications and pillage cities.
2. Arming a humanoid tribe with captured weapons so they can better kill the druids' enemies.
3. Sacrificing dogs, bulls, and horses by cutting their throats on a great stone altar.
4. Carving intricate knotwork in standing stones to create hidden pathways between distant lands.
5. Spying or casting spells remotely through faces carved in the bark of distant trees.
6. Harvesting mistletoe with a golden sickle from the branches of an oak tree beneath a full moon.
7. Using animals to pull up mandrake roots which kill with their screams when unearthed.
8. Burning prisoners alive in great wicker cages shaped like men or beasts.
9. Killing a sacrifice in three ways at once, by hanging, impaling, and drowning in a peat bog.
10. Brewing a terrible plague in a cauldron filled with dragon blood.
11. Teaching the trees to talk and move and hunger.
12. Protecting a rural village in exchange for the first born of each family to raise as their own.
13. Attending a war council of great animal spirits.
14. Forgetting language and becoming lost in the shapes of beasts.
15. Ambushing travelers along the forest trails, leaving their heads at the edge of town.
16. Placating the demon bound in the old black hawthorn with a gift of blood.
17. Heralding the new season by dancing and leaping naked over a great fire kindled by bones.
18. Reading the future in the movements of birds and death throws of the disemboweled.
19. Searching for a lost artifact that summons earthquakes, floods, storms, and locusts.
20. Preparing magic elixirs to transform people into enormous feral monstrosities.
21. Hunting legendary beasts and eating their hearts to gain their power.
22. Animating the ancient stones to serve as their guardians and warriors.
23. Blessing or cursing the fertility of a noble lineage so the prophesied child takes the throne.
24. Applying warpaint that grants the strength of beasts and the heroism of the ancestors.
25. Gathering to decide on a new archdruid – lots of fights, scheming, politics, and kinky shapeshifter sex.
26. Completing a ritual so an ancient hero can be reborn from the womb of a wolf.
27. Bringing tribute to a great dragon, currying favor to get help sacking a major city.
28. Freeing the animals from a menagerie or colosseum to rampage through the streets.
29. Summoning the forbidden spirits of murder and decay out of desperation as the end times near.
30. Burning EVERYTHING. The garden of Earth is strangled by weeds; it must be cleansed in flame to give new life a chance to grow.